Hi! I'm a newbie who says ni!

[Myst]

Well, OK, so I don't say ni that... often... I don't think. *scratches head* Anyways, you may have seen me at the MLPTP (as yeasel) or Arena (as Mystery,) but I'm pretty new to roleplaying. Anyways, profile form thingies:
email address: mystery5(@)comcast(.)net (remove parentheses)
messengers: None.
favourite 2003 pony: Starswirl
rp experience: Not much. I've been in a couple Yu-Gi-Oh! roleplays on Neopets, and the Muses' club when the TNT was a PHP forum, but that's about it.

My first character is Myst:
name: Myst
age: Uh... 'round 13-15, I guess.
type: unicorn
symbol: A hazy cloudy foggy type thingy (covers entire body except head and hooves)
colors: lavender body, white hair with a few thin bright pink streaks here and there
powers: being able to somewhat keep Flame (next charrie) under control by levitating him, and winking in and out.
description: Mostly a hired babysitter to keep Flame under control while in Ponyville, sometimes mysterious, quiet, and serious, and keeps Flame semi-in line like she should, sometimes encouraging him by being nearly as hyper and annoying. Sometimes wears bright pink eyeshadow type stuff. (Think Jem.)
birthplace: Dream Valley
history: Not much is known about her. She kind of blended in as 'just another pony' in Dream Valley. Except when she mixed a cup of sugar into all the milk bottles at the Lullabye Nursery. She got many dirty looks from the other ponies after that incident.

Next charrie...

name: Flame
age: About nine.
type: Big brother pony. (Though he looks and acts more like a little brother pony...)
symbol: A really small flame.
colors: Black body, reddish-orange hair.
powers: Does being really, really annoying count?
description: He's very annoying and obnoxious, usually on purpose. Alot of ponies dislike him, he's not allowed in Dream Castle without a (responsible!) chaperone.
birthplace: Dream Valley.
history: His parents and sister live in Dream Valley. He is disliked by many, most of them adult ponies. His parents needed a break from his awful behavior, so they sent him to Ponyville with Myst. They're hoping as he gets older he'll act more mature, but they know in the back of their minds that this is nearly impossible.

[Roxanne]

Welcome! : )

Ok, your form looks pretty good - my only suggestions would be to pin down Myst's age (remember if she's only four years older than Flame, could she really control him that well?), and to give her more of a history. I like Flame's story (although you could expand too - what kind of havoc does he wreak?), but Myst must have some kind of background too!

Oh, her personality confuses me - she can be both serious/mysterious and hyper? It sounds like you want the best of both worlds. Try pinning her character down a little more.

But don't fret, I'm just bein' a bit hard on you because I see potential in these characters ; ).


(We are no longer the Knights who say ni! We are now the Knights who say ickickiickiptoooomsmmmmbpoinnng *giggles*)

[Myst]

OK, I guess Myst tends to be more serious, but sometimes Flame tempts her too much, and she joins him in his hyperness(this may be the "I can't beat 'em, so I'll join 'em!" philosophy at work.) For her age, I guess I'll make her 15, and for history, um... *thinks* she was once a pickpocket, but she stopped quickly because ponies would always distance themselves from her and give her dirty looks. (She was about 10 when this happened.) She once had a job at the Satin Slipper Sweet Shoppe, but got kicked out when she allowed Flame to mix coffee and rainbowberries into some of the ice cream. Other havoc Flame has wreaked:
The time he stuffed bushwoolies in Heart Throb's vanity.
The time he taught the newborn ponies all sorts of belches and phrases they probably shouldn't know.
The time he filled Dream Castle with soap bubbles (it came out the drawbridge and over the walls!)
In salons, he always picks up hair clippings to make itching powder and sometimes replaces the perfume with swampwater.
He will often sing annoying songs (like the nerve song, or "We all know frogs go *ssssssss* on the frying pan"...) at the top of his lungs for no apparent reason.

[Roxanne]

Ok, looks good! *stamped*

Go ahead and register an account and start playing! : )